Someone wrote into JobStreet.com asking for help in managing her boss. Her boss was female and therein, the dilemma apparently. As I was doing some research for this article I came upon electronic reams of data on the difference between male and female bosses, why women were better supervisors than men, glass ceilings, etc. You name it! But for the benefit of the reader who posed this question and the rest of us, let's dig a little deeper into some of these apparent differences right now.

According to many reports, women still prefer working for male bosses. Now why is that, I hear you ask? Here are a few general opinions about female bosses and their work styles:

General Opinions of Female Bosses
(These are not necessarily the opinions I hold, but that of the general public.)

Often, a double standard occurs when the behaviours of men and women are labelled. Like it or not, we still have some ingrained notions of what is deemed as acceptable female behaviour. A woman boss tends to be stereotyped as either a "B***h" or a "Bimbo".

The former title is applied to those women who crawled through neck-deep hell to rise to the top, who worked extra hard, gave no allowances for failure, didn't believe in weaknesses and couldn't stand those who had them.

Says Jennifer Lee of her ex-boss: "It went beyond being tough. She had succeeded under very difficult circumstances by being absolutely ruthless, by sacrificing her private life and by giving her life to work. If you weren’t prepared to do the same, she had no time for you. She was much, much harder on women than she was on men. She looked down on women who had children or went home early."

But it could all be just a matter of our own perceptions of what's normal for a man and a woman. When a woman shows strength of character in a meeting, for instance, she may be seen as "aggressive" whereas her male counterpart is seen as "assertive". Sounds familiar?

The "Bimbo" title is given to describe the airhead who influenced and coerced into her position using her female wiles. It is said that she is incompetent and remains in the corporate stratosphere only by means of her charm on the male bosses who unwittingly fall prey to her.

I certainly can't imagine people still think this way today. Then again, I can't say some women don't use this tactic. But if they succeeded, who put the boss there in the first place?

'When bosses do appraisals it can be a give away,' claims Jason Phoo, a 40-year-old MIS manager at a multimedia company. 'A woman manager has had to struggle so she's more insecure and competitive; she worries about others doing so well that she'll be kicked out. A male boss, on the other hand, hasn't had such a hard fight to achieve his position and, therefore, can afford to be more generous to up-and-coming staff.'

With a more progressive approach to diversity and a greater number of women helming organisations, women feel comfortable enough to use their natural management style, which tends to be more communicative, relationship-oriented and team building in nature. Women have greater verbal aptitude and verbal comprehension than men, and are more emotionally and spiritually intelligent. This gives them the potential to be more understanding bosses than men.

Carly Fiorina, the secretary who became the highest-paid chief executive at Hewlett Packard, is a good example. She motivates her staff with human touches such as “get well” cards and thank you notes.

It is said that the corporate arena is a male's world. As women were climbing the corporate ladder and breaking through thick glass ceilings and walls, the only people they could see above them were the men. So the 1980s stereotype of the female boss as 'queen bee' is still prevalent. In sectors like law and finance where the 'queen bee' personality is particularly prevalent, women bosses' role models are almost always men.

Flirting comes naturally to women who use it almost unconsciously, so it's hardly surprising that women prefer working for men. Historically, it's one of the few natural powers women have felt able to display without repercussions.

Says Laura, 25: "If men realise you're using your sexuality at work, they play along with it. If they don't realise you're doing it, they still tend to respond positively. You can't lose." Fancy a game of chess, anyone?

Most times, women can get sympathy from men who are queasy at the thought of women's problems, such as pre-menstrual cramps or morning sickness. They'd rather you didn't tell them anything and leave the office for an afternoon than watch you deal with it. Women bosses, on the other hand, know exactly what the complaint means and how serious it can be. So, there is less of a trump card with women bosses.

Relationships between women tend to go to either end of the spectrum: either watchful adversaries or the best of friends. Lee-Ann says: "I'd rather work for a man. Women are too emotional and take things more personally. I don't have to like a man or have him like me to have a good working relationship. If you don't get along with your female boss, you're done for. I think that one of women's biggest weaknesses is their need to be liked by everyone. Men are less personal about work."

One female executive says: "I have better female friendships, but men are more straightforward. You always know where you stand with them. With women, you have to work them out a little more. Women tend to be more subtle and crafty. Men are straight out with it. I'd rather take the punishment and get it done with once and for all!"

For all the talk about the differences, in today's world, I believe it's not so much about gender as it is about perceptions and understanding management styles. Part of the problem with this article is that it still deals in generic perceptions such as what stereotypes say and what people traditionally think about gender differences.

We are at a point today where it's no big deal to have a female boss. Women in this generation do not feel suppressed at the workplace any more than men do. Generalisations can be dangerous - no one sex can have a monopoly on character traits, especially in a world where there is far less gender segregation than suffered in earlier times, and such great equality in opportunities for all to learn, socialise and achieve.

Yes, there are cultural roots for a gentler management style amongst women, but to be effective in your working relationships with your bosses, male or female, you first have to do away with preconceived perceptions and start thinking about their individual personality and management style.

Get to know the way your boss operates, and how that affects you. Everyone has certain dominant management styles and some are more effective in some areas than others.

Here are some tips on managing your boss, whether female or male:

1. Learn your job and do it well. Credibility in the workplace will earn you respect. This respect will translate into further confidence and faith in your performance.

2. Understand where your boss is coming from. Nothing is more self-affirming than being understood - if your boss feels understood, he/she will be open to your influence and change strategies. So stop talking and listen up.

3. Know when to pick your fights and when to walk away. Learn to identify and create strategic alliances with people who want to move the same direction you do. Learn when the fight is futile and find out why for your own future value.

4. Be patient. Your ideas and approaches came to you over time. Don't expect your boss to immediately understand your concepts with a sheet of paper or presentation. Recognise that you need to bring your boss through a similar journey of understanding that brought you to your idea. Otherwise, you'll waste your time manoeuvring and dodging bullets.

5. Document. Always get clear instructions and deadlines. Involve your boss in regular updates and make sure your name is credited on reports. Create drafts for review and record all meetings. This way, misunderstandings with regards work are always solved by black-and-white evidence.

6. Never be dishonest or sneaky. Avoid backstabbing and bitching. That only paints a bad picture of you, no matter what the situation was. Try to work through the issue constructively. Trying is better than whining.

7. Know yourself. Understand what you want out of a boss and how realistic it is. Not everyone is cut out to be the perfect manager. Don't keep pushing your expectations on a boss that will not live up to them. You only make yourself increasingly frustrated. Develop a working relationship that will do its best to maximise the work process. Focus on your development.

At the end of the day, recognise your sphere of control and stop harping on things beyond your grasp. Work with your boss' strengths and in spite of his/her shortcomings. Awareness is the most vital step you can make. At the end of the day, this will be what matters in knowing how to manage your boss. Not if your boss is a man or a woman.